


Chasing Polaris

by indarias



Category: Chase Me - Dreamcatcher (Music Video), Dreamcatcher (Korea Band)
Genre: Character Death, F/F, Fluff, Gay, Ghosts, alternative universe, blink and youll miss the super super brief suayeon, in which gahyeon is really into the paranormal, jiyoo, spoopy, they're not ghost hunters they're just really curious girls, yoohyeon is skeptical but for like 2 seconds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:53:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22028857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indarias/pseuds/indarias
Summary: Yoohyeon doesn't know how she ended up in a haunted hotel trying to talk to ghosts when she doesn't even believe in them. Nothing could go wrong right?
Relationships: Kim Minji | JiU/Kim Yoohyeon
Comments: 53
Kudos: 153





	1. a ouija board and a stupid idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know if people have done a jiyoo ghost au before but heres my shot at it. this is loosely based off of the chase me mv and the title will make sense in the end i swear  
> also i have no idea how ouija boards work and i kept spelling them as ouiji for the first half of the fic until i googled it

“I bought a ouija board off of Amazon,” Gahyeon announced, plopping herself onto the empty seat beside Handong. The group of girls seated at the table looked at her questioningly, waiting for her to continue. “There was a sale! I thought we talked about this.”

“Talked about what,” Yubin prompted. Gahyeon’s answer didn’t really clear anything up.

“Wanting to talk to ghosts? Find out whether they’re real or not? It was just last week.” Yoohyeon couldn’t help but burst out laughing after seeing the serious look on her face. The girls had discussed trying to communicate with ghosts but Yoohyeon was pretty sure they were all joking about it. She didn’t think that Gahyeon actually wanted to try. The thought of them sitting in a circle waiting for a ghost to talk them was pretty amusing. Gahyeon just stared at her, not really understanding what was so funny about the situation. She was completely serious.

Yoohyeon didn’t know how to explain to her that using the ouija board was a stupid idea, and the younger girl looked so excited when she talked about it. She didn’t want to discourage her and it’s not like it would hurt anyone. Ghosts don’t exist after all. So Yoohyeon played along, ignoring the incredulous looks that Handong and Yubin were giving her. She asked her what she planned to do with it and Gahyeon launched into a very detailed explanation of how ouija boards worked. It was only when Gahyeon brought up going to a ‘haunted hotel’ did she get the girls’ attention.

“Haunted hotel?”

“Well yeah? How else are we going to test the board out? Trust me, the place is definitely haunted,” Gahyeon quickly pulled out her phone to search something before sliding it across the table to show Yubin and Yoohyeon. It was an article that described supposed ‘hauntings’ that occured in Polaris Hotel, a very old abandoned hotel. The murder of three young girls happened in one of the rooms of that hotel, which eventually closed down due to lack of business. Many ghost hunters had tried to come into contact with the spirit of the girls when news of the murder spread. There were reports of flying furniture and a scary amount of wind which chased the ghost hunters away. The owners of the hotel ended up closing it off and forbidding anyone from entering.

Yoohyeon rubbed her temples slowly. Was Gahyeon out of her fucking mind? “We can’t do this,” Yoohyeon tried her very best to muster up a firm tone. Her resolve quickly melted away when she saw Gahyeon frown. She wanted to make her happy but this was a bit much wasn’t it.

“I have a plan I swear. I checked out the place last weekend and I found a small opening in the wired fence surrounding the hotel. There’s barely anyone in the area. C’mon it’ll be fun,” Gahyeon pleaded. Yoohyeon glanced at Yubin, trying to read her expression.

Yubin just shrugged, “What’s a better way to bond than breaking and entering.”

* * *

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Yoohyeon muttered softly. The four girls were walking around the vicinity of the hotel, trying to find the opening that Gahyeon had seen. Handong and Yubin were taking it in stride despite being reluctant at first. Yoohyeon still had trouble processing the fact that they were about to trespass into private property to find ghosts. There could be worse ways to spend a Saturday night she supposed.

Gahyeon was skipping about excitedly. It wasn’t surprising that she was the most energetic out of all of them. She’d gone through the plan with them thousands of times. Get into the hotel, take out the ouija board, light up some candles and talk to ghosts. Simple. Seeing her so hyper made Yoohyeon feel slightly better. At least one of them was enjoying herself.

Eventually, they do find the opening. Gahyeon had failed to mention how incredibly small it was. The other girls crawled through it with ease but Yoohyeon was rather tall and did not enjoy the feeling of the wired fence scraping against her legs. Nonetheless, she made it to the other side safely. Yoohyeon rushed forward to catch up with the three other girls who were already making their way to the intimidatingly large building. Gahyeon walked straight up to the entrance of the hotel and swung the door open. How she was so fearless was beyond Yoohyeon.

The sight that greeted them did not reassure Yoohyeon whatsoever. Shards from what she assumed to be broken vases were strewn all over the floor. Some tables were smashed into the walls, almost as if someone had thrown them. The centerpiece was a large chandelier right in the middle of the lobby, dangling precariously from the ceiling. It was tilted sideways with bits of the crystal chipped off. The only thing that seemed to have been left untouched were the large windows that stretched from the floor to the ceiling. Yoohyeon carefully stepped over the debris, calling out to Gahyeon, “You sure you still want to do this?”

She only nodded and Yoohyeon could see the determination in her eyes. The scene had not deterred her but rather made her more motivated to find out if this place was truly haunted. Yoohyeon tried to calm herself. It was probably just a brawl. Maybe the ghost hunters were fighting amongst themselves. She took a shaky breath. She’s overthinking. Yoohyeon clung to Handong as they followed the little one up a flight of stairs from the lobby, the moon being their only source of light.

Gahyeon opened every door, trying to find a room that wasn’t too messy so that they could proceed with the plan. It was harder than it seemed because almost every room had been wrecked by some sort of storm. They eventually settled for a room tucked in the corner of the second story. Gahyeon passed a lighter to Yoohyeon, telling her to set up the candles around the room. According to her, it would work better with candles. Yoohyeon quietly did as she was told, a sick feeling growing in her stomach.

The girls gathered in the center of the room, sitting in a circle. Gahyeon took the ouija board out and gently placed it on their laps. She instructed them to place their fingers on the small heart-shaped piece of wood called the planchette. The girls followed her instructions, not daring to utter a single word. The atmosphere in the room had gotten heavy and Yoohyeon could hardly breathe.

Gahyeon didn’t even get to begin the process when all the candles blew out in one swift second. Yoohyeon immediately looked at Gahyeon, hoping that the younger girl knew what was happening. She seemed just as lost as the rest of them, panic swirling in her eyes. They didn’t have much time to think about it because the ouija board flew straight into the edge of the nearest table, snapping into half. No way in hell were they staying here. Yoohyeon quickly grabbed her own backpack and yelled for them to get up. Handong and Yubin followed in suit, but Gahyeon seemed to be mesmerised by the swirling pile of debris that was flying towards her. Yoohyeon yanked her by her arm to snap her out of it and they all rushed out of the room together.

Just as they were about to leave the hotel, Yoohyeon glanced back one last time to see if there was still flying furniture chasing after them. To her surprise, she caught a glimpse of a white nightgown and two glowing eyes staring back at her before the door slammed shut in her face. The strangest thing was, the eyes looked afraid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've planned about 5 more chapters and an epilogue so do stick around if you like it so far :))) and feedback is always welcome


	2. creepy dreams and a socially awkward girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how I imagined [minji](https://twitter.com/yoohcolours/status/1253866512621821952) in this chapter

Yoohyeon could barely see anything under the dim moonlight. She knew she was on the floor, but she didn’t know how she got there. Where was she? She tried sitting up slowly, placing her hands on the floor to prop herself up. She hissed when her palm brushed against a sharp piece of glass. It had dug deep into her flesh and Yoohyeon winced when she saw the blood. She looked around, searching for something to wrap the wound with but there was only more glass shards and broken furniture.

She carefully stood up, wobbling slightly. Her other hand immediately went up to her temples, trying to soothe her pounding head. One quick glance at her surroundings and she knew where she was. The hotel. How did she end up here? Her train of thought was quickly interrupted by a strong force slamming her into a wall. She hit it with a loud thud, her head spinning. Then, a hand grabbed her by her neck, pinning her up. Her feet were lifted off the ground and Yoohyeon was gasping for air. She couldn’t breathe.

She gripped the hand that was choking her, desperately trying to pull it away. She flailed wildly in an attempt to free herself. Yoohyeon finally looked at her attacker. She was wearing a long white nightgown, her jet black hair hiding most of her face. It was unmistakable that it was the girl she’d seen right before she left the hotel with her friends. Her eyes still held the same fear.

Her vision got blurry before she finally passed out.

* * *

Yoohyeon jolted up, her breathing ragged. She looked around. It was just her room. She was in her room. She breathed out slowly, wiping the sweat off her forehead. It was the third night in a row that she had gotten the same fucking dream. She would wake up in the hotel, and that girl would choke her until she lost consciousness. Yoohyeon quickly got up and washed her face. She hadn’t told her friends about it yet because she didn’t think it was a big deal. Was it normal to have the same dream for three nights straight?

“The exact same dream?” Gahyeon tilted her head slightly, deep in thought. The noisy canteen was not helping Yoohyeon’s headache. If anyone would know anything about it, it would be Gahyeon. When she told her friends about the girl she had supposedly seen, Handong and Yubin brushed it off as her imagination running wild. Gahyeon believed her, mostly because of the unexplainable things that had happened in that hotel. It didn’t surprise her that there was in fact an entity there. They all however, did agree on never returning. Even though Gahyeon was still insanely curious about the hotel, it was far too dangerous to go back.

“I haven’t been having any dreams,” Handong piped up.

“Neither have I.”

So it was just Yoohyeon. Yubin gripped her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Anxiety was practically radiating off of Yoohyeon. She didn’t understand. Had she really imagined the girl? She could remember her so distinctly. At least, what she saw of her. Those eyes were the only thing she had been thinking about the past few days.

“Hey I’ll look into it okay? Don’t worry too much,” Gahyeon gave her a small smile. Yoohyeon tried to return it. She didn’t know how to describe the sinking feeling in her chest.

When Yoohyeon woke up 2 nights later from the same dream, she decided to take matters into her own hands. She’d been so out of it the past week and Gahyeon’s search resulted in no answers. She hated that this stupid dream was distracting her so much that it was affecting other aspects of her life. If she woke up in the middle of the night from the dream, she wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. Her friends had taken to calling her a zombie after seeing the dark circles around her eyes.

Yoohyeon checked the time. 12.21 a.m. She had plenty of time before school started, and it wasn’t like she was going to get any more sleep. “Fuck it,” she muttered under her breath. She was going to deal with it on her own. She quickly dressed and grabbed a coat. It was very unlike her to make impulsive decisions but she didn’t know what else to do. Perhaps one final visit to the hotel would put her mind at ease.

She cycled all the way there, the night breeze causing her to shiver. She wanted to get this over with. Yoohyeon parked her bicycle behind some bushes before she began searching for the opening. This would’ve been much easier with Gahyeon around. She couldn’t remember where it was for the life of her. Yoohyeon rubbed her hands together and breathed out. She could do this. She had to.

She found it eventually, though it had been about half an hour before she did. She quickly crawled through and jogged towards the looming building. All she had to do was go in and see that there was no creepy girl trying to kill her. Well, and avoid all flying furniture while she was there. Not a problem.

She slowly pushed the door open, taking a peek to see if there was anyone there. It was just as they had left it. Exactly the same as in her dreams. The wind closed the door shut behind her, making her jump. Her heart was beating hard against her chest. She’d dreamt herself dying here five times now. Why did she think this was a good idea? Yoohyeon walked up the stairs, not really sure what she was trying to do. The hotel was completely still, as if the building itself was holding its breath.

Yoohyeon froze when she heard a loud thud. An invisible force knocked her off her feet and she hit her head against the steps of the stairs. She quickly got up and ran. Her legs seemed to be moving on their own, adrenaline pumping in her veins. She had to hide somewhere. Yoohyeon ran towards a random door, forcing it open and locking it behind her. It wasn’t like that would’ve stopped the entity? Girl? Whatever it was.

Yoohyeon took deep breaths, a million things clouding her mind. It took her a second to realise that the room she was in was completely intact. It looked like an actual hotel room with everything in place. The bed was neatly packed and there were towels hanging outside the bathroom door. She didn’t have much time to think about it because suddenly, a girl appeared in front of her. It was like a scene taken out of a children’s show.

The girl hadn’t seemed to have noticed Yoohyeon. She was much too distracted by the room they were in. Yoohyeon was in awe. She was in the same nightgown she had seen when she and her friends left the hotel. The same one she kept dreaming about. Her hair wasn’t black like in the dreams but rather, a lighter shade of brown.

Her hand flew to her mouth, trying to muffle the sobs escaping from her lips. Yoohyeon winced. Her cries were filled with pain and Yoohyeon didn’t understand why. She looked so… human crouched on the floor like that. She approached her cautiously, hoping that the other girl wouldn’t lash out and throw her straight into the wall.

“Are you okay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI YOOHYEONS BIRTHDAY IS IN ABOUT 2 HOURS AND 30 MINS FROM NOW SO YALL BETTER BE WISHING HER >>>:(((  
> also haha my laptop is spoiled so I’m battling my iPads autocorrect trying to post this it’s such a pain  
> as always feedback is always welcome thank you for reading :D


	3. a gorgeous night sky and two girls

The girl froze, finally realising that Yoohyeon was in the room with her. She backed away slowly, looking frightened. Yoohyeon raised her hands up in surrender. She didn’t understand why she was so afraid of her. After all she was the one with the scary ghost powers. She could’ve easily killed Yoohyeon if she wanted to.

“Why did you come back?” she asked in a soft yet surprisingly sweet voice.

“I kept dreaming about you,” the words left her mouth before she thought them through and she felt her cheeks warming when she realised how it sounded. The girl just stared at her questioningly. The tension in the room was thick and Yoohyeon wanted to break the silence. “I’m sorry about my friends and I. We didn’t mean any harm I swear. We were just curious about this place. You’ve got a pretty scary reputation y’know.”

“Reputation?”

“Yeah? There are stories of ghost hunters being scared shitless because they were chased by a flying chair.” The girl giggled softly and Yoohyeon’s blush deepened. She wanted to replay that sound over and over again. “My reputation wasn’t enough to keep you away?”

“I told you, I kept having dreams about you uh, killing me.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” she sounded offended.

“I mean the way you chased my friends and I out of the hotel was pretty damn terrifying. Reading about it and actually experiencing it was really different. But I guess we kinda deserved it? Being curious doesn’t excuse us invading your… home?,” Yoohyeon didn’t really think that the hotel was very homey at all. It was awfully lonely and quiet. She couldn’t imagine living here.

“I’m sorry for attacking you guys. I never know the intention of anyone stepping in here. The last time someone came, they tried to ‘capture’ me with some sort of device so it’s better to scare everyone off. It’s safer.”

“I get it. You’re not gonna attack me anymore right?” Yoohyeon rubbed her neck awkwardly.

“No promises,” the girl had a ghost of a smile on her lips and it made Yoohyeon’s heart flutter. She was glad that she wasn’t crying anymore. “Do you have a name?” Yoohyeon wanted to slap herself. That was a dumb question of course she had a name. The girl looked lost in thought, her eyebrows scrunched together. Did she have a name?

“It’s… it’s Minji,” she replied after a minute.

“Ah, I’m Yoohyeon.”

The conversation flowed easily after that. They talked about trivial things like how much the world had changed ever since Minji had been stuck in the hotel. She was insanely curious about how the outside world was like and Yoohyeon tried her best to answer all her questions. She avoided talking about Minji’s death or why she was trapped here, though it did cross her mind. She didn’t know how long they spent talking and she didn’t really care. Once you got behind the initial fear of being attacked and possibly killed, Minji was actually really easy to talk to.

It was only when her phone started buzzing did Yoohyeon realise how much time had passed. It was the alarm she set to wake her up so she could get ready for school. She ran her hand through her hair and sighed. “Minji I need to go.”

Minji only frowned and Yoohyeon wanted nothing more than to bring her smile back. She lifted her hand and tucked Minji’s hair behind her ear subconsciously, the faint scent of flowers invading her senses. It surprised Yoohyeon that she could touch Minji. The sudden contact seemed to have shocked the other girl as well, because she was looking at Yoohyeon with her mouth agape. She reached out and slowly laced her fingers with Yoohyeon’s before whispering, “Please stay.”

The warmth from her hand made Yoohyeon feel giddy. “I’ll come back this afternoon, after school okay? I promise.”

* * *

Polaris Hotel had always been a prison to Minji. There were endless things she didn’t like about the building. She hated how big the place was. There were so many floors and rooms and it made Minji feel so small. She hated the mess. Even though she was the one that caused it, it always hurt her head to see all the broken furniture scattered everywhere. She had considered cleaning up once but decided against it. The mess that greeted unwelcome visitors at the lobby was usually enough to scare them away and that was enough for her.

Most of all, Minji hated the suffocating loneliness she felt. She had long broken the grandfather clock that was in the lobby. Just another piece of furniture she used to scare the guests away. She deeply regretted it, because she didn’t realise how disconnected she felt when she had no sense of time. She didn’t know how many days had passed either. She lost count after a month. There were always people visiting but they rarely ever had good intentions. Minji was afraid someone would come and hurt her. Loneliness was a small price to pay for safety.

But no matter what, she always took extra care not to damage any windows in the hotel. The windows were Minji’s only connection to the outside world. She could watch the sun rise and fall, and she loved waiting for the moon to appear. The hotel was quite far off from the city and the sky would always be filled with thousands of stars. Watching the night sky made Minji feel less alone.

Then came Kim Yoohyeon. Minji didn’t understand Yoohyeon. She couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that this girl came back after she had dreams about dying here. She caught Minji in a vulnerable state when she had hid herself in room 808 and she was far too emotional to chase Yoohyeon away. Minji was glad she didn’t.

She felt like a breath of fresh air. The first person she had talked to in months or maybe even years. Minji felt slightly embarrassed that she couldn’t remember her own name. To be fair, it had been ages since she needed to use it. That first night she spent talking to Yoohyeon made Minji feel alive and she didn’t want her to leave. So, when Yoohyeon came back in the afternoon, Minji smiled for the first time in a long time.

It became a daily thing after that. Yoohyeon would drop by right after school and they would spend hours talking about nothing in particular. The more time she spent with her, the harder it was to watch her leave. She would try to make it up to Minji by leaving behind books and card games for her to entertain herself with while she was gone. She remembered that one day Yoohyeon frustratingly tried to teach her solitaire. Having something to do during the day kept Minji distracted from the daunting hotel and the crushing loneliness she felt was slowly dissipating with every day that passed.

“You like the stars?” Yoohyeon asked one afternoon.

Minji nodded eagerly, “I love them.”

She didn’t know a thing about stars and neither did Yoohyeon, but the younger girl agreed to stargaze with her that night. She left briefly, claiming that she needed to grab supplies. She came back later with a bunch of blankets and candles.

“Did you bring another ouija board too?” Minji joked after seeing the candles. Yoohyeon’s cheeks turned slightly pink and she quickly defended herself. “The candles will set the mood. You’ll love them.”

Minji just laughed. Yoohyeon was so easy to tease. She got to work clearing a spot right in front of the large windows in the lobby. They would get a perfect view of the night sky from there. When the candles were set up, Minji had to admit that they did change the atmosphere of the area. There was a strong scent of flowers that overwhelmed the room. “They’re scented candles. I bought them because they reminded me of you,” Yoohyeon stared at her feet, looking incredibly shy.

“Thank you, I love it,” Minji pulled Yoohyeon into a hug that lasted a second too long. Eventually they settled into the makeshift blanket fort and waited for the sun to set. They spent the rest of the night pointing out stars and talking. When Yoohyeon finally fell asleep in Minji’s arms, she couldn’t help but feel lucky for the first time in her life.

Yoohyeon had vowed to learn about the stars when she woke up the next morning. She brought books and showed Minji articles about astrology and the sky. She promised she would learn everything she could and teach her about all the constellations. Minji didn’t understand how she could be so kind to her, especially with how their first meeting went.

“This hotel was called Polaris hotel right?” Yoohyeon waited for her to confirm it before she continued, “It’s actually a star in the Northern Hemisphere and it’s also known as the guiding star because it seems to hold still as the entire north sky moves around it. It’s been guiding explorers for centuries! Even when the moon is out blocking a lot of the stars, you can always trust to see Polaris shining through. Isn’t that comforting? Explorers always knew which direction they were heading when they saw it.”

Minji nodded slightly, admiring how Yoohyeon’s eyes lit up talking about the star. Polaris had trapped her, not guided her. She couldn’t really think of the name Polaris without getting a sick feeling in her stomach. She didn’t let that ruin her time with Yoohyeon and tried her best to pay attention to the taller girl’s ramblings about the stars.

She had spent most of her time at the hotel living in fear of someone hurting her but Yoohyeon had changed that. For the first time in years, Minji felt like she was actually living. She was so fucking happy. So when Yoohyeon finally asked the question she had been dreading, she couldn’t find it in herself to be mad.

She could tell what Yoohyeon wanted to ask immediately when she was acting more awkward than usual. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but is it alright if I ask how you died? Or why you’re trapped here?”

Minji couldn’t stop herself from tearing up, even if she did expect her to ask. She could tell that Yoohyeon immediately regretted asking because her face was scrunched with worry. She quietly took her into her arms and gently brushed her hair away from her face.

“You’re not obligated to answer Minji. I’m sorry I asked.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to. It’s just that I haven’t thought about it since it happened. There’s not exactly that many people I can talk to,” she struggled to get the words out. They sat together, completely silent until Minji calmed down. She wanted to talk about it actually. It had built up within her for so long. She breathed out slowly before giving Yoohyeon a weak smile.

“Well get comfy because it’s a real long story.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> henlo i'm sorry if the dialogue doesn't seem natural or you think that they're moving too fast !! this is happening over the course of about two weeks? i tried my best i'm not very good at dialogue  
> anyway longer chapter and i posted it early because im going for camp next week and i wont have time to write chapter 4 so please be patient with me !! feedback is always welcome thank you for reading :D


	4. a really shit father and a rough past

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: abuse, brief hints of sexual abuse/rape, use of slurs, and death

Kim Minji never saw herself as a cowardly person. She could count the number of things she was afraid of on one hand. But there was nothing or no one she was more afraid of than her father. He was a large man, practically looming over her. She couldn’t remember when exactly she started fearing him. She could however, distinctly remember when he started to change from a loving father figure to someone she couldn’t recognise. 

She could tell the moment she stepped into the house that something was different. It didn’t take her long to find out what happened when she was greeted with the heartbreaking scene of her father, the strongest man Minji knew, crying. Every sob that tore through his throat deeply unsettled Minji. She could remember feeling completely helpless. Minji already knew what had made her father so upset. Her parents had been fighting for months. It honestly surprised Minji that they had held on for so long. Minji noticed a letter in her father’s hand and she gently pulled it away from him before rubbing slow circles into his back. 

She briefly glanced at the letter. It went something along the lines of an apology and explanation. Minji could feel hot tears of frustration swell up in her eyes. Even though her parents weren’t happy, she wished that her mother thought of a better way to solve their issues. She wished she had tried to talk to her about it. 

It only went downhill from there. More nights than not, her father would come home at ungodly hours reeking of alcohol and vomit. The smell made Minji sick but there was never a night she wouldn’t help him to his bed and got him to change out of his clothes. She did it because she needed to. He was her father. Until he acted like he wasn’t. 

The changes were small. He was more easily agitated, every little thing would get on his nerves. Her father, who used to never snap at her, started to yell at her almost daily. Minji didn’t take it to heart, choosing to instead watch her words and actions around him. He was having a rough time and Minji needed to be there for him. He was her father. 

He started skipping work. When he took the first two weeks off, Minji could understand. Losing someone suddenly like that had affected him a lot and he needed time to heal and get better. After the two weeks, he didn’t return. They had countless fights about his work. Minji just wanted what was best for him and she knew that being jobless would not do either of them any good. But her father was a stubborn man and even after her endless pleading, he refused to return to work. His dismissal letter was mailed to the house a month later. 

When things at home became too overwhelming for Minji, she found solace in two people. Kim Bora and Lee Siyeon. Bora was a small and aggressive girl, filled with seemingly boundless energy and she always knew how to make Minji laugh. Siyeon was on the other end of the spectrum, with a calm and level-headed way of thinking, she kept Minji and Bora focused and on task. The three of them balanced each other out despite being so wildly different. 

They kept Minji sane. She told them everything, from the divorce to the way her father had been acting. It helped, knowing that there were two people she could count on to pour her frustrations out to, without any judgement. They would give advice, or take her mind off of things if she needed it. All she had to do was say a word and they would be there. They loved Minji, after all. 

* * *

“Father I’m home,” Minji closed the door carefully behind her, the air stinking of beer. She turned the lights on, treading over the bottles littered on the floor. A loud booming voice caused Minji to flinch.

“Why are you home so late? I told you that you needed to be back by 10pm!” her father stormed into the room, his eyes wild and furious. It was clear that he was drunk from the way his words slurred and he tripped over his feet trying to get to Minji. 

“You’ve been drinking. Please ca-”

“Fucking hell Minji you were hanging out with those two fags again weren’t you? They’re a bad influence on you. I fucking told you not to spend time with them anymore,” his voice was getting louder and Minji’s ears were ringing. Her father did not approve of Bora and Siyeon even before the divorce and he had practically forbidden Minji from going out with them. 

“Father please listen to me. It’s not even 9.30pm yet and I wasn’t out with Bora and Siyeon,” Minji said softly, trying to soothe the agitated man. 

Minji could barely blink before she felt a hand land hard on her cheek. The force of the slap caused her to stumble backwards. She pressed against the door, her hand on her stinging cheek. “Don’t fucking lie to me,” her father glared at her, breath uneven and ragged. 

It was only when her father had left the room did she let go of the breath she didn’t realise she was holding. Her mind was still reeling from the shock of the slap. Her father had never hit her before. He would never lay a hand on her. He was her father. 

She got up slowly, careful not to make a sound in case he came back. She made her way to her room, gently placing everything down before going into the bathroom to see the result of her interaction with her father. A tiny gasp escaped her when she saw, clear as day, a bright red mark the shape of a hand imprinted on her right cheek. Minji quickly got an ice pack and pressed it against her cheek, hissing from the pain. 

Just as Minji was about to call Bora and Siyeon to tell them what happened, there was a light knock on her door. She hesitantly got up and opened it, only to see her father looking distressed. His eyes were swelled up, a tell-tale sign that he had been crying. When he saw the red mark on her cheek, he got on his knees sobbing. Minji could barely make out what he was saying but she knew it was along the lines of an apology. She only nodded and hugged him, letting him cry into her shirt. 

Minji felt guilt eating away at her. She was ashamed that she thought even for a second that he wanted to hurt her intentionally. She swore to him that she wouldn’t utter a word of what happened that day. He wouldn’t hurt her again.

It only became more frequent. She would do something small and he would hit her out of anger. But every single time, he would apologise. Minji couldn’t find it in her heart to be upset at him. He had been through a lot. It was her fault for not listening to him. It was her fault for being so careless. It was her fault for being so ungrateful and disobedient when all he wanted was what’s best for her. He was trying his best wasn’t he? 

She slowly stopped spending time with Bora and Siyeon after a particularly nasty argument with her father that ended up with multiple bruises and cuts. Eventually she cut off most contact with them, only seeing them during school in the hallways. They had tried reaching out to her but she was radio silent, and stubbornly so. Minji told herself that her father was right. They were bad influences. Because of them she kept going out so late. Because of them she was spending less time taking care of her father.

Minji had become an expert in lying. There were days on end that she felt like all she was saying were lies. Lies about how she was, lies about her father, lies about the marks littered on her arms and legs. She couldn’t stop lying, all to protect him. She lied to everyone, but it had taken years of thinking alone in Polaris hotel for Minji to realise that she lied to herself most of all. She had lied to herself about what Bora and Siyeon had meant to her. She had lied to herself about what kind of daughter she was. She had lied to herself about what her father had become. 

* * *

“Minji, you look so much like your mother,” her father had whispered into her ear one night, caressing her cheek softly. Minji willed herself not to flinch. That hand had hurt her one too many times. It would only take a second for his mood to change and another two for her to be hit. Her father gazed at her, his eyes glazed with something Minji couldn’t put her finger on. It unsettled the butterflies in her stomach, now fluttering anxiously. 

He had been saying that for the past week, how he missed her mother, how she looked just like her. Minji couldn’t understand what he was trying to say and she didn’t want to find out. He stood up suddenly, looking very serious.

“You should pack your bags. We’re going on a little road trip,” her father announced.

Minji frowned in confusion. “What’s this about? Why all of a sudden? I have school tomorrow.”

“Missing one day won’t hurt. We’re going to the outskirts of town, to a little hotel called Polaris Hotel. You always talk about the stars so you’ll definitely love it. It’s far off enough that during the night the sky is filled with stars. Don’t argue with me I already booked it for tonight so go and pack,” his voice became hard. 

Minji gave a small nod and rushed to her room, a sick feeling building up in her gut. He was planning something. Going with her instinct, she texted Siyeon for the first time in weeks.

_he’s taking me to a place called polaris hotel tonight and i have a bad feeling_

_it’s probably nothing but if anything happens thats where i am_

She quickly kept her phone, hoping that the texts were enough to convey her distress. She didn’t know why she felt so worried. Her father probably just wanted to relax in a place away from home. She had nothing to worry about. 

They drove to the place in silence. Minji couldn’t remember how long the drive was, her nerves getting the best of her. She watched as the rows of houses slowly melted into endless fields of trees. “We’re here,” her father said as a large building came into view. 

“Polaris,” Minji muttered, the word stuck in her throat. Should she be feeling this nervous? She glanced at her phone to see a long stream of worried texts from both Siyeon and Bora. She sighed. At least they knew where she was. She left the messages unread, stepping out of the car.

She waited at the lobby while her father talked to the receptionist about their room. The old grandfather clock in the lobby ticked loudly, pounding in sync with her heart. She took deep breaths. This was going to be okay. Nothing was going to happen. It was just her father. After a while, he finally turned back to Minji, holding up a key labelled ‘808’. They slowly made their way up the long flights of stairs together, the air thick with tension.

When they finally made it to their room, Minji’s heart was racing. She couldn’t explain why she felt so nervous. She glanced at the room, nearly tripping over herself when she saw there was only one bed. Her father pulled out a bottle of alcohol and settled onto the bed. He took two swings before letting out a satisfied sigh. He gestured for her to come closer.

“You’re so tense love. You need to learn how to relax,” he pulled her onto the bed and handed her the bottle. “Drink.” 

Minji knew better than to argue. They took turns drinking from the bottle, the alcohol burning her throat. It wasn’t long before the bottle was finished. Minji’s head was spinning. Her father had already started on another bottle, chugging it with no signs of stopping. She was drunk. She was drunk alone in a hotel room with her father, far away from home. Fuck.

She stumbled into the bathroom, quickly opening her messages. 

_i thunkj im durnk_

_siyeon ate you comig i dont hnwo what hjes gona do_

The loud bang on the bathroom door startled Minji. “Minji get the fuck out of there. We need to have some fun and relax,” her father laughed, his banging incessant. Even drunk, Minji wasn’t stupid enough to disobey him. She quickly opened the door and was surprised when he grabbed her arm and dragged her onto the bed. 

“I’ve been meaning to do this for so fucking long Minji,” he quickly unbuckled his belt and pulled his pants down. Minji’s ears were ringing and her vision was blurry. She wanted to scream. She wanted to do something. She couldn’t think. She struggled to push him off as he pinned her onto the bed. 

Then, the hotel door slammed open and Bora raced towards her father and tackled him off of Minji. “Stay the fuck away from her!” Bora screamed, punching him square in the face. Siyeon rushed to Minji, pulling her to her chest and stroking her hair comfortingly. Her father pushed Bora aside with frightening ease, her small figure no match for the large man that was her father. He yelled in frustration when Bora attempted to tackle him again. He grabbed an empty bottle from the floor, smashing it against her face.

Bora crumpled to the ground in an instant with bits of glass and blood flying everywhere.

“No!” both Siyeon and Minji shouted in unison. Her father didn’t stop. He approached them, holding the broken bottle in one hand. He stared at Siyeon almost challengingly, wanting to see if she dared to fight back. Siyeon was fiercely loyal, and this man had just hurt the girl she loved. She lunged towards him, aiming to wrangle the bottle away from him. He pinned her to the ground and stabbed the sharp edges of the broken bottle into her chest. Over and over and over again.

Her cries would haunt Minji for the next few years. When her father was done, he stepped towards Minji, his anger undiminished. “You just had to fucking tell your useless friends where we were? I just wanted to give you a chance to relax Minji! Fuck you’re so ungrateful! Everything I’ve ever done has been for you!” He grabbed another bottle and threw it, his aim perfect despite being intoxicated. 

The last thing Minji saw was her father’s enraged eyes.

* * *

When she woke up again, she could see people. So many people. She was in the same room. Why were there so many people? It was so loud. People chattered non-stop. Her hazed mind caught bits and pieces of conversation.

“- unfortunate. The girl was so yo-”

“- lifetime sentence. He deserves it.”

“The family members are here!” the voice was loud and distinct. A few people walked in, all sobbing. A person led the group of people to a white sheet laying on the ground. Minji followed, curious. Her heart lurched when she saw the familiar face of Bora. Or what was left of her face, now disfigured and gruesome. 

Minji was suddenly hit by the memories of what had occurred just an hour ago. She couldn't breathe. Why was she still alive? She turned and very nearly threw up. There, propped against the wall was her body, covered by a thin piece of cloth. She screamed. 

She screamed and screamed and screamed. It didn’t matter. No one could hear her. Minji had died but she was still here. Here trapped in the same fucking hotel, forced to live with what she had done to Siyeon and Bora. It would be a long time before she would learn how to manifest, and chase all the living away from this damned place. It would be a long time before she would be alone again with only her thoughts and her guilt to accompany her. 

* * *

When Minji was done telling her story, she was sobbing. Yoohyeon pulled her into her chest and stroked her hair, whispering sweet nothings into her ear to soothe her. It was at that moment that Yoohyeon swore to herself that she would find a way to set her free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i know the last time i updated was more than two months ago but life caught up to me and this chapter was also really hard to write. like painfully hard i tried so many times and now im not sure im very satisfied with how it turned out but i think i did minjis story justice. and im compensating my long overdue chapter with the longest update to date of 2.7k words!! and this is as heavy as it gets okay the rest of the story will be much more lighthearted. fun fact: when i was writing minjis drunk texts i tried closing my eyes and typing the words so it would seem like a natural typo but it turns out i can write perfectly w my eyes closed so that was annoying
> 
> also HAVE YALL LISTENED TO DYSTOPIA whats your favourite track im so so so in love with jazz bar. anyway thank you for still kudo-ing and giving this story love while i was away it really motivated me to pull through this chapter and post it :)) feedback is always welcome thank you for reading


	5. an obnoxiously red bicycle and a really good friend

“Don’t you think she’s been acting a little weird,” Gahyeon whispered softly, cocking her head slightly towards Yoohyeon who had been staring at her food for a good 10 minutes without touching it. Her eyes were glazed and she looked very deep in thought.

“She’s always acting weird Gahyeon,” Yubin didn’t even look up from her phone as she answered, her mouth stuffed with food. Gahyeon glared at her, tugging her sleeve to get her attention. “Weirder than usual! Look at her she never spaces out during recess. We have a hard time getting her to  _ stop _ eating. Something’s bothering her.”

“Yeah she’s been really distracted in class too. The teacher’s called her out twice today for daydreaming,” Handong added, her voice low. It didn’t matter if they were whispering or not. Yoohyeon wouldn’t have noticed either way by the looks of it. 

“Yubin you need to talk to her.”

Yubin looked up from her phone, giving Yoohyeon a long glance. She gently shook her, snapping her out of her trance. The taller girl blinked and looked around, seemingly unaware of where she was. 

“You doing okay there bud?”

“Huh yeah,” Yoohyeon just shook her head quickly before diving into her untouched food. 

Odd. 

* * *

“Yooh! Wait up!” Yubin huffed as she chased after Yoohyeon. Damn that girl’s long legs. “What’s the rush? Do you want to grab lunch with Gahyeon, Handong and I? We haven’t spent time together outside of school for forever.”

“Ah sorry I can’t. I have somewhere to be,” she rubbed the back of her neck and shot Yubin an apologetic smile. 

“Hey you know you can talk to me about anything right? If something’s up I’m right here.”

“Why all of a sudden? I’m doing fine Yubin.”

“It’s just, we’ve noticed you’ve been out of it ever since the trip to the hotel. It’s the nightmares isn’t it? If it’s been bothering you, you can talk to me or Gahyeon or Handong. We’re all worried about you.” At the mention of the hotel, Yoohyeon visibly tensed. She looked alert for the first time in the past two weeks. 

“It’s not the nightmares I swear. I’ve just been busier and it’s kinda hard to cope. Please don’t worry too much,” Yoohyeon said quickly, glancing at her watch. 

“Did you go back? To the hotel I mean,” Yubin stared straight into her eyes. Yoohyeon was nervous. “I didn’t. I have no reason to. The nightmares stopped after I told Gahyeon about them the last time. Yubin I really need to go I’m so sorry. We can talk about this tomorrow!” With that, Yoohyeon rushed off, almost tripping over herself. 

Yubin sighed. This girl really couldn’t lie to save her life. Yoohyeon had rejected every invitation to hang out ever since she had told Gahyeon about the nightmares. She also rushed away after the last class every day, and Yubin was sure she didn’t take up extra classes. She knew her best friend. If the nightmares had been bothering her, she would’ve found a way to deal with them. But how exactly did she do that?

She jogged over to the bicycle rack where her bicycle was chained. Unchaining it quickly, she mounted it and started pedalling. If her instincts were right, she should be cycling to the outskirts of town to Polaris Hotel. She was 90% sure she would find Yoohyeon’s unmistakable bright red bicycle dumped in the bushes somewhere near the hotel. The thought of Yoohyeon alone in that creepy place made Yubin pedal harder.

When she arrived, she spotted the red bike hidden very poorly in one of the bushes. She breathed out slowly. What the hell was Yoohyeon thinking? Yubin stashed her bicycle in the same bush before searching for the opening in the wired fence. She crawled through slowly, afraid to make too much noise. Even on the other side of the fence, Yoohyeon was nowhere to be seen. She really had gone into the hotel. Was this where she’d gone the past two weeks?

Even though it wasn’t her first time seeing it, the size of the hotel was really something to behold. At least the first time she had the company of her friends. Every step she took towards the hotel felt like a punch in the gut. What if Yoohyeon wasn’t even there? God this was such a bad idea. She should’ve asked Gahyeon and Handong to come with her. There was no turning back now. 

Yubin pushed the doors open slowly, her hand wrapped tightly around her umbrella. It was the closest thing that resembled a weapon and she sure as hell was not going into that stupid hotel unarmed again. When she opened the doors, she stopped in her tracks. The whole lobby was clean and free from debris. If it wasn’t so empty, it could’ve actually passed as a hotel lobby. Did Yoohyeon seriously spend her time… cleaning? 

She could hear hushed voices speaking and slowly, she followed the direction of the sound. One of the voices definitely belonged to Yoohyeon. Who was she speaking to? She crept up the stairs and peeked, only to see Yoohyeon talking to another girl. It was the girl she had described in her dreams. The same girl Yoohyeon said she had seen right before they left the hotel. 

“What the fuck?” the words slipped out from Yubin’s mouth before she could stop them. 

The girl immediately looked at her, her eyes swirling with panic and alarm. In an instant, she vanished into thin air, leaving both Yubin and Yoohyeon confused. Yoohyeon turned around and spotted Yubin, her expression hurt. “Yubin? Why are you here? Did you follow me?” 

“Who was the fuck was that?” She could hardly process what Yoohyeon was saying. Her head was spinning trying to comprehend how that girl just  _ disappeared _ . “Yubin listen to me! You scared Minji away!”

“Minji,” she muttered the name softly. The girl. Minji. “She’s the same one in your dreams isn’t she? This is what you’ve been doing the past few weeks.”

“Fuck why did you have to follow me? She doesn’t trust people. Tell her you won’t hurt her, please,” Yoohyeon looked worried.

“I’m not going to hurt you I promise,” Yubin called out, not really sure what was happening. 

“I know you’re listening Minji. Please trust me. She’s my best friend and she isn’t here to hurt you,” the older girl’s voice was laced with concern. She called Minji’s name out a few more times but received no response. Yoohyeon gave a long sigh of resignation before grabbing Yubin’s arm and dragging her out of the hotel. 

“We have a lot to talk about,” she gave her a weak smile.

* * *

They cycled to the nearest coffee shop and Yoohyeon downed two cups of coffee before telling the whole story to Yubin, from the night she went back to the hotel all the way to what happened just now. She left out certain details about Minji’s past and Yubin knew better than to ask. 

“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” 

“If I had told you or the others, you would’ve wanted to see her. You wouldn’t have believed me. And you saw for yourself how she reacts around strangers. The only reason why she even let me talk to her the first time was because she hadn’t entered 808 since the incident happened and it caught her off guard. If I wasn’t lucky enough to have picked that room to hide in, I probably would’ve been chased away too. She doesn't like new people and I didn’t want to stress her out,” Yoohyeon took another long sip from her coffee. “I just want to figure out how to help her Yubin. She isn’t meant to be here.”

“From what you’ve told me, it sounds like she’s the one trapping herself here Yooh. She feels guilty doesn’t she? She blames herself for the deaths of her friends and she’s punishing herself for it.”

“How do I help her if she thinks that,” her voice was filled with desperation. Yoohyeon already cared for this Minji such a great deal. You had to be blind to miss it. 

Yubin shook her head slowly, “This isn’t something you can help her with. She has to learn to forgive herself.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys i hope you're all doing well!! with the state the world is in right now please take care and stay safe. i hope this chapter makes your day a little better


	6. an empty chair and silence

Minji breathed out as she heard the footsteps slowly quieten. Only when she heard the lobby doors slam shut did she manifest, glancing around to check that no one was there. She could feel her heart thumping hard against her chest. Fear still brewed in her gut as she tried to recall the face of Yoohyeon’s friend. How could she not have sensed her when she snuck in? She was usually so quick to notice when people stepped into the hotel. 

What was wrong with her? She had protected herself fine all these years and yet in the span of a few weeks she let her guard down twice. She needed to be more careful. She couldn’t get hurt again. 

So when Yoohyeon came by the next day, Minji refused to manifest. 

“Minji please come out,” Yoohyeon called out. “Please.”

Minji stood a few metres away from her, still invisible to Yoohyeon. She watched her carefully as the younger girl kept yelling her name. The hurt in her eyes were evident, and Minji turned away so she wouldn’t have to face her. 

“She isn’t here I promise,” desperation seeped into her voice and Minji hated how much it affected her. 

She finally gave in, manifesting far enough away from her so that she couldn’t touch her. Minji looked around warily, still unsure if Yoohyeon’s friend truly wasn’t there. 

“You don’t trust me,” it was more of a statement than a question. She locked eyes with her, trying to read what she was feeling. Neither of them made a move to speak, both sitting in the deafening silence that was building between them. 

“I’m sorry for yesterday. I swear I didn’t know she would follow me. I wouldn’t ever have tried to bring someone over without telling you,” Yoohyeon finally broke the silence, pausing to see if Minji would respond. She didn’t.

“I told her everything,” she hesitated when she saw the alarm on Minji’s face, “Not every detail. It’s not my story to tell. But Minji, she suspects that you’re trapped here because you blame yourself for the death of your friends. Do you think that's true?”

Minji’s breath hitched as her mind flashed to Bora’s disfigured face. To Siyeon’s piercing cries. She could feel her knees buckle and her hands pressed against the wall as she tried to stabilise herself. She couldn’t breathe. Fuck she couldn’t think. She could barely hear Yoohyeon as she rushed to Minji’s side. “Your guilt is trapping you,” Yoohyeon whispered more to herself than anyone else, holding Minji close to her chest.

With that, Minji disappeared.

* * *

Yoohyeon was stumped. She had gone to the hotel two more afternoons after that, but Minji had not reappeared. She couldn’t say that she was surprised, considering the way the older girl had reacted when Yoohyeon mentioned her friends. She could only think of one thing left to do.

“You should’ve told me earlier!” Gahyeon nearly toppled her chair over when she stood up suddenly, eyes alight with excitement. 

Yoohyeon winced from the sheer volume of Gahyeon’s voice. She covered her ears before replying, “I knew you’d react like that.”

Gahyeon opened her mouth to ask a question but Yoohyeon gave her a stern look, “No you can’t visit her. Yubin followed me and scared Minji away. She doesn’t trust new people.” 

She gave a little huff and sat back down, eager to hear the story of how Yoohyeon had managed to befriend Minji. In one long breath, Yoohyeon told both Gahyeon and Handong the whole story, patiently answering any questions that the younger of the two had. By the end of it, the fire in Gahyeon’s eyes had not diminished. Rather, it had gotten stronger.

“It sounds to me like you should talk to her about it,” Handong said calmly, looking deep in thought.

“But I have!”

“No, she told you how she died. She didn't talk about her feelings afterward.”

“I tried. Dongie she won’t even appear anymore. How can I talk to her when she doesn’t even want to see me?”

“You just need to keep trying. You clearly care about her. Don’t give up on her yet,” Handong gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

* * *

If Minji thought that she was stubborn, she clearly never met Yoohyeon. The girl was stubborn beyond anything Minji had ever imagined. Every day without fail, Yoohyeon stopped by the hotel. She would settle into a chair in the lobby, her favourite one, she had told Minji on multiple occasions. The chair was placed right at the spot where they first stargazed. Her and Minji had placed two of the hotel chairs there and spent many afternoons sitting together and talking about anything under the sky. 

Now Yoohyeon sat there alone. Minji had habitually taken her place beside Yoohyeon, but of course the taller girl didn’t know that. Some afternoons she would ramble about her day. Other afternoons she spent begging Minji to manifest, to look at her, to talk to her. Minji spent those afternoons as far away from her as possible, afraid that if she saw Yoohyeon’s face, she would do anything to make her smile again. 

Minji used to think she wasn’t a coward. She couldn’t bring herself to think that anymore. Not when she was hiding away in a random room in the hotel, from the only girl that had cared about her in a long time. Not when she knew that Yoohyeon just wanted to help her. Not when she’s far too scared to talk about it again. She didn’t want to be reminded of her two friends. She didn’t want to think about what they could be doing, how they would be if they were still here. 

So she hid. Somehow, Kim Minji had turned into a coward. How did it come to this?

It was a week into the routine that made Minji particularly afraid. Yoohyeon had barged into the hotel, her eyes bloodshot. It looked like she hadn’t slept at all. 

“Minji I can’t keep doing this. Fuck, I can act like it doesn’t bother me but it hurts. I haven’t seen you in a week. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I mentioned your friends. I’m sorry I brought it up. Minji please just talk to me. I need to know you’re okay. Give me a sign, anything. We don’t need to talk about your friends,” Yoohyeon called out, her voice watery and wavering. 

She looked around slowly, just to make sure she wouldn’t miss any possible signal that Minji could give. Minji didn’t make a move, her breath caught in her throat. After a minute, Yoohyeon let out a sigh of resignation or maybe defeat? Minji wasn’t sure. The younger girl picked up her backpack and left, closing the door slowly behind her. 

For the first time since they met, Yoohyeon didn’t come the next afternoon. Minji willed herself not to worry. She told herself it was nothing. Yoohyeon probably got sick. She would come the next day. Nothing Minji said would get rid of the gnawing feeling that it was her fault, once again, for chasing away Yoohyeon. 

When Yoohyeon didn’t come the day after that, the familiar loneliness started seeping under her skin, suffocating her much faster than before. She had taken for granted the solace that Yoohyeon had brought to her, and the hotel felt a million times bigger than it had ever felt before. Minji cried out to the silence of the hotel, as she sat in the chair beside Yoohyeon’s, wishing that she hadn’t pushed her away. 

And she waited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey !! we're really close to the end of cp just another chapter and a short epilogue left so please stick around !!! quarantine has really made me get back into writing what have yall been up to? thank you for reading :D


	7. a goodbye and stars

The second Yoohyeon opened the doors to the hotel, Minji engulfed her in a hug, clinging to her so tightly that she couldn’t breathe. Minji felt her tense up for a second, then two, before finally relaxing into her. She tangled her hands into her hair as Minji cried into her shirt. The two girls stood at the doorway for a long time, neither saying a word. 

“I thought you wouldn’t come back,” Minji’s voice was muffled and soft as she whispered, face still burrowed into Yoohyeon.

“I’m sorry. I was just so tired and finals were coming up and this whole thing stressed me out so much,” Yoohyeon said before quickly adding, “I wouldn’t have left you alone.”

Yoohyeon gently tugged Minji along to the spot where they first stargazed, pushing aside the chairs and settling on the floor so that the older girl could nestle into her. She seemed to sense that Minji needed the human contact after not seeing her for a week. Only after they had settled down did Minji finally speak.

“I hated myself. The entire week I hated myself. I hated that I was so stubborn, I hated that I was so afraid. I’m such a fucking coward Yoohyeon,” Minji felt Yoohyeon rubbing slow circles into her back in an attempt to soothe her. She breathed in before continuing, “Every second stretched on for hours and I’d never felt more alone before and all I could think about was how _I_ did this to myself. I chased you away like I did with everyone else. It was my fault again. And the worst part was that I wouldn’t ever be able to tell you how much you meant to me. That the last memory you would have of me would be our fight.”

“I took you for granted. I took the company and the feelings you gave me for granted. I don’t want to feel that loneliness again,” Yoohyeon reached out to wipe the tears away from Minji’s cheeks.

“I won’t leave you alone,” she swore, reaching out to grip her hand tightly. The two girls relished in the silence that enveloped them, an atmosphere so similar yet so different from the week before. Minji soaked in Yoohyeon’s presence. She was here. She hadn’t left.

“Are you ready to talk about your friends?” she asked quietly.

Minji nodded slightly, closing her eyes. She dug past that day in the hotel, past the screaming and the hurt and the smell of death. It had been so long since she thought about Siyeon and Bora beyond what had happened in the hotel. She couldn’t remember the last time she had talked about them. But it was easy. So easy to dive straight back into the warmth that was her two closest friends. When she started talking, she found that she couldn’t stop.

They spent hours, wrapped in each other as Minji recounted everything she could. She couldn’t keep the grin off her face as she told Yoohyeon of Bora’s infamous yearly April Fools’ prank, where one particular year ended up with the three of them sneaking a pig into the principal’s office and a month long detention. Minji could recall distinctly how proud she had been when Siyeon told them that she had gotten the solo part for her band’s upcoming recital and how they had celebrated by sleeping over at her place, jamming and singing their hearts out to good music late into the night. Minji talked and laughed and cried until she was breathless and overwhelmed by memories she had hidden for years.

“I miss them,” she admitted, her voice hoarse from the hours of talking. She hesitated for a beat before asking, “Do you think, do you think they’d be disappointed?”

“Minji, from everything you’ve told me, they obviously loved you. If they were ever disappointed in you, it’d only be because you blame yourself for their deaths.”

“But it _was_ my fault. If I hadn’t texted them, they wouldn’t have come Yooh. They could’ve lived,” she could feel tears pricking at the corner of her eyes as she shot back. 

“Do you really think that they’d want this for you? That they’d ever want you to punish yourself for years alone here? They came to this shithole to save you because they loved you!” Yoohyeon cupped her cheek gently, tilting her face towards her. “And how long would be enough? You’ve been here for so many years that you lost count. Isn’t it enough? Haven’t you suffered enough? Please let yourself move on.”

Minji’s mind spun and swirled. She gripped onto Yoohyeon tightly, sobbing hard. But she doesn’t disappear. She’s done being a coward. 

When Yoohyeon left, she spent the rest of the night thinking. She was right wasn’t she? It had been enough. Bora and Siyeon wouldn’t have wanted this in the first place. What was she doing? How many years had she wasted? For the first time since she set foot in this hotel, Minji felt lighter. Her shoulders had carried a weight so unbearable for the longest time, and it had eased knowing that, somewhere up there her friends were waiting. She needed to return to them.

* * *

“Yoohyeon you’ve taken such good care of me and we haven’t-” Minji paused to cover Yoohyeon’s mouth with her hand, not wanting to be interrupted by the confused girl. “No listen to me. We haven’t known each for long but you mean so much to me.”

She took a deep breath, trying to stop the tears from falling. She had told herself she wouldn’t cry but it was so hard when Yoohyeon was looking at her like _that._ Her eyes held so much affection that Minji was practically swimming in it. “You keep telling me that this is no way to live, but you don’t realise that I haven’t been living until you first stepped into the hotel. You made me feel less alone and I’m so fucking scared to let you go. I like you so much Kim Yoohyeon.”

Yoohyeon laughed, lifting her chin up before finally pressing their lips together softly. The kiss was filled with unspoken promises and an ache that coursed through every part of her being. They only pulled away when Yoohyeon could no longer breathe, their arms tangled together. “I like you too. You’re so easy to love Kim Minji. I don’t think I’ll ever forget you.”

“I didn’t want to go before saying goodbye. I think… I’m ready,” her voice suddenly stronger, laced with conviction. “Do you think they’re waiting for me?” 

“Of course they are. You’ve kept them waiting for so long they’re probably old already. You don’t have anything to be afraid of,” Yoohyeon could feel Minji’s heart thumping wildly with how close they were. She could sense the nervousness behind her voice. She ran her hand through Minji’s brown locks, pushing her hair back so that she could see the smaller girl’s face clearly before leaning in to kiss her again. She stopped right before she could because Minji was... glowing? It was different from all the times she had disappeared and manifested. 

“You’re glowing,” Yoohyeon giggled, peppering her face with light kisses. 

Something flashed through Minji’s eyes as she spoke, realisation filling her voice. “You’re my guiding star Yoohyeon. My polaris. Thank you for being the brightest star in my sky,” she whispered between kisses. 

And with that, Kim Minji disappeared for the last time. 

* * *

Yoohyeon laughed as she watched Yubin and Gahyeon play with Pie, the latter screaming more than playing. She trudged towards Handong who was setting up the picnic mat before night fell. It was a new normal for them to venture to the outskirts of town at least once a month so that they could look at the stars. 

Her group of friends had taken a liking to stars and astrology as much as her after the whole polaris ordeal and it had become tradition to stargaze together. She grabbed her speaker and some snacks from the truck and passed them to Handong. Yoohyeon sat at the edge of the mat, staring out at the sunset. The whole sky was painted in shades of orange and pink. It wouldn’t be long before the sky would be littered with glittering stars.

“Yubin! Gahyeon! Get your asses over here!” she called out. The two girls had gotten so wrapped up in playing with Pie that they were barely a speck In Yoohyeon’s vision. They raced back to the truck, Pie following in suit. 

The four girls got cozy on the picnic mat, practically laying on top of each other as they sang the words to Day6’s I smile blaring out of the speaker. They spent the next half an hour singing and laughing and talking while waiting for night to come. The darkness gradually draped over them, and soon stars started to appear in the sky. 

Yoohyeon couldn’t keep the smile off of her face as she pointed out the constellations. Her mind drifted off to the familiar scent of flowers and a radiant smile that hadn’t left her mind. Surrounded by the warmth of her friends under the endless night sky, she couldn’t help but think of the girl she never should’ve crossed paths with. The brightest star in the sky.

_fin._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and it's done! im sorry it took so long but im so happy i managed to finish this. chasing polaris is the longest piece of writing i've ever done which might seem laughable because what's an 11k piece to the hundreds of thousands of words written on this site? but im so immensely proud of it and im happy i took the leap to try something longer than what im comfortable with. i always told my good friend that i'd never try anything more than oneshots because the less words there is, the less of it there is to hate but im so fucking happy i didnt stick to oneshots. cp has taught me so much about writing and if i could rewrite it there would be a lot i would change but that just means that ive learnt from it and i think that's good enough. thank you for following this story and leaving all your comments and kudos it seriously means the world to me and motivated me alot :D i already have plans for an upcoming jiyoo (yes jiyoo again leave me a lone) knight/princess au that's gonna be much longer than this one so dont be a stranger !! once again thank you so much for reading !!!!!
> 
> if you want updates on the upcoming fic or you just wanna yell about dc you can do it on my [twitter!](https://twitter.com/yoohcolours) (i changed accounts a while back and it was a pain in the ass to shift all the images for the fics >:( anyway i think my layout is pretty lol) okay that's it see you around!!


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